Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in shaners' LiveJournal:

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Tuesday, December 11th, 2001
10:49 am	im a loser baby so why dont you kill me hey kids...sooo ummm i dont update anymore ummmm things to let you know when im at home...im not happy when im with you i am its almost been a month for you people keepin track...thats right ive been seeing the same girl for nearly a month hehe its not long i know but im fuckin stoked nonetheless...you know you thought it wouldnt last kristyn and tyler cruised the converge show last night i wish i coulda saw planes mistaken 4 stars cause they fuckin rock yo christmas is depressing i wanna get people things but i cant really plus kristyns bday grrrrr i wanna do something cool but most of the time cool=money...ill figure something out if you gots ideas talk to me dont post em dorkface! she'll read em scars show is on thursday i think...might go $6 plus 5 buck drink fee...thats alot of money to see your friends band plus sat that show will rock...troy borns last show =( taken will not be the same grrr i hate shows cause they cost money something tells me i should get a job i fucing suck ps...my mom called me a son of a bitch...again!!! she needs to go into a coma...that would be nice (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, November 22nd, 2001
7:50 pm	Name: Shane michael bernard downey yo Birthday: july 28 1985 where do you sleep: i alternate between the gross leather couch and the king size bed hehe how many hours do you think you spend on the internet a week? not to many considering i dont have internet access What kinda music are you into: emo, screamo, and rock are a must...anything can rock favorite band:cave in any drugs: no way smoke: nope drink: gross striaght edge or ever was : of course...by the way if youre not now you never were ever been in a fight: kinda favoriate show:ptw at showcase cXn at halloween a bunch of others when and what was your first show: eighteen visions, idle hands, wrench, taken, nemirah @ chain about two years ago favorite person: kristyn funniest person: jd dan and dave most shy: kristyn i think prettiest: kristyn most confident: not me most humble: dunno what do you want to be when you grow up: a boy and stufff...cuttin and stylin and dying and whatnot what is your biggest goal in life: being happy what is your dream: to become a rock star and be on TRL do you have a girl friend or boy friend: that i do...she so sweet i just wanna lick her all up and down do you want children: yea do you want to get married: very much so do you like hats: sometimes want is your worst fear: im scared of alot most bieng emotions where do you shop: where all the cool kids do one night stands: no thanx do you like clubs: never been though ive heard oh so much about club beat it...its the new scenester thing to do so i better go...ding ding ding scene points do you like to laugh: of course do you like to smile: helll ya but youre smile makes me sick what makes you happy:lip rings noises/ kristyn/ my friends/ music/ lots of stuff what makes you sad: ignorant dumb bitches roadkill other sad people things in pain who do you hate: such harsh words....hmmmm satan and your mom except kristyns she is cool are you happy at this moment... why or why not: hell ya cause im talkin to kristyn work: hopefully the gap do you have tattoos: soon my friend any holes in your face: haha yea and other places too what is your favoaite animal: penguins wear shoes full or earthworms or a hat filled with spiders: the shoes rather people told you you were ugly or stupid 3 times a day: stupid cause by them saying that it proves that theyre the stupid one do you wear p.js: nope (1 Comment |Comment on this)
3:19 pm	after a long while i have decided not to live a vegan lifestyle any longer it has become a burden on my family due to finnacial troubles and i often found my mother buying me food that she thought was vegan that wasnt and just watching that food that she spent money on sit and go to waste this just happened to me right now with my aunt and i cant do it anymore please dont judge me by this decision for it was very hard and i gave put lots of thought into it i still very much believe in animal rights and will remain a very strict vegitarian and will most likely be eating vegan 90% of the time anywayz i would like to resume a vegan diet once i am completely on my own supporting myself veganism is still extremely important to me and i feel like crying right now and those of you who know me well would know that i do not want to do this I often times found myself with nothing to eat whether it was at a friends house or at a restraunt and its just too much i need to eat cause afterall im a growing boy i know ill prolly get crap for this but i know whats in my heart i was 100% vegan for almost two years so if anyone wants to talk shit who is vegan lets just see how long you last i <3 you i <3 animals =( (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, November 19th, 2001
10:13 am	this weekend was absoloutely amazing on friday randy jacob nick tyler bryan dave me and some random cute asian girl went to nickle nickle hehe and it was way fun!!! hehe all though there air hockey game is a lil screwed up haha =P on sat me and randy hung out *high five* we went to knotts for like 2 hours cause my grandpa got us in free cause hes a veteran and stuff...my mom had this special pass because of her back and she gave it to me and we would just go in the exit and get on the ride hehe it was awsome after that we met some kids at woodbridge del and it was strange cause that random cute asian girl was there again what the heck and some of us went off to see juliana theory it was a rockin show welll almost all the other bands pretty much sucked but let me tell you juliana theory freekin rocked...just like the way everything flowed so well together it was awsome itll prolly be the last time i'll be able to see them w/o them getting radio airplay or on MTV or something considering they just got signed to epic records the same label as limp bizquik for gods sake hehe anywayz they rocked and they played my 2 fav songs for there encore songs which was awsome and the whole show i was accomponied by the cute asian girl...i think i have a crush on her or something...who knows maybe she does too hehe =) after the show tyler nick bryan ursula daviekins me and that girl i think her name was kristyn watched the meteor showers which was beautiful considering i had never seen a shooting star then i saw like 50 in like ten minutes it was freekin awsome...only bad thing its was brrrrr cold...but thats what girls are for?...right hehe kristyn got me a lil surprise too hehe it was the sweetest thing ever...she pulled it off oh so smoothly hehe...incognito <3 on sunday i went to my daddys and worked and stuff haha and let me tell you he put me to work i had to crawl in the attic and pull wires and stuff...fun fun hehe i felt like i was in army training or something but then i got some new shoes!!! yay i got navy blue percells...they rock i wanted baby blue but they didnt have em in my size besides dark blue is more neutral...hehe at least more than purple i want baby blue sauconys hehe =) ummm i think thats about it I heart ... you know who you are (theres alot of you) <3 (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, November 16th, 2001
10:16 am	Full Name - Shane Michael Bernard Downey Birthday - 7/28/85 Location - irvine, orange county, california, usa. Zodiac sign - Leo Nicknames - shaners? Height - 5' 11 Eye color - green Hair Color - black Right, Left, or Ambidextrous - right DO YOU ... Have a BF/GF- ya shes a cute asian girl hehe Have a best friend(s)- not really Have a crush - on my girlfriend, yes. Talk to your crush regularly - uhhuh Watch TV or listen to radio more - tv but i barely watch it except movies Know what time it is - 10:20 Got a homepage? - nope Have a pager - nope Have a cell phone - negative im not that cool Type LiKe ThIs - negative WHICH ONE... Pepsi or Coke - coke Cordless or wire -cordless Square or circle - circle Rain or sun - rain Dark or bright - dark Left or right - right Right or wrong - I try and do what?s right, but it always ends up being wrong. HAVE YOU EVER? Walked in the rain - helll ya Talked on phone all night -i do regularly Stayed online all night - haha ya Done drugs - besides tobacco and alchohol no Drank alcohol - umm ya Gone a day w/out eating - hehe ya Thought about suicide - who hasnt Made prank calls - yes hehe Been in true love - negative Slept all day-ya but its no good Been out of the country - mexico Toilet-papered someone's house - hell yeah Broken into someone's house - ya PRESENTLY... What are you doing - filling out this survey What are you wearing - jeans and stuff r sad - fairly happy. ummm happy nely or content - content cause i got a hot N sexy girlfriend and stuff WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU... Took a shower - like 2 hours ago Had a serious conversation - last nite i guess said i love you and meant it - all the time Said "I'm going to kill you" and laughed about it - haha ya im militant hehe j/k Went to the mall - like a week ago WHAT IS YOUR... Most embarrassing moment - i dunno honestly Most cherished possession - my penis Fave color - baby blue Fave holiday - i dont really have one least fave holiday - ummmm Fave saying(s) - go get aids have an acid flashback and die!!! hehehe Fave time of day - sunset Fave song(s)? - umm theres too many fav shop - ummm thrift stores and stuff Fave time of year - winter Fave place to chill - koos dland main street Fave subject in school - this class all i do is surf the net Least fave subject in school - this class it gets boring RANDOM BITS... *Kissed someone: uhhuh so drunk you blacked out: negative Cheated on a boyfriend or girlfriend: no way!!! *Kept a secret from everyone: i dunno *Set a body part on fire: my hair *Had an imaginary friend: no *Called or seen a psychic: haha no cried at a chick flick: not like full on cried but i have shed tears *Had a crush on a teacher: i dont think so *Found a cartoon character attractive: i dont think so *Ever at anytime owned a New Kids on the block tape: nope *Watched Punky Brewster: i used to watch it all the time *Eaten a whole box of cookies and thought you were fat after - that i have *Been on stage: yeah its crazy *Gotten in a car accident: i guess..with randy once YOU... *Wear eye shadow: i have...but not ragularly *Have a dog: ya *Have any regrets: only one *Who do you go to for advice: ussually kristyn sometimes randy but he is bas alot jd i helpfull too *Who knows all your secrets? prolly randy *Who do you cry with: myself my mommy sometimes DO YOU BELIEVE IN... *God/Devil: yes one is evil but you can decide which one *Yourself: sometimes *Aliens: nope *Love: ya *Destiny: very much *Signs: ya *The Closet Monster: negative someone for everyone? yes well i think you everyone will find someone eventually kristyn is my girlfriend now incase you guys didnt notice shes one sexy momma <3 (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, November 15th, 2001
10:32 am	another thing thanx to such feature films as the edge of quarrel and grimlock songs called the pain game matt brad dan and i are gonna be militant and i guess randy too and maybe nick but hes too nice but hes fucking tough to all you druggies go die (3 Comments |Comment on this)
10:28 am	hello things have been goin pretty good for me lately im stayin at my dads for the rest of the week just because its nice to live a normal life once again like with a phone and stuff hehe they are usefull machines esspecially to call cute asian chicks with nice asses haha things with kristyn are going really well i can just be myself around her and i can tell her anything without getting critisized another recent thing is ive decided not to be the nicest person in the world anymore not that im gonna be like an asshole now im just gonna stick up for myself the nicer you are the more you get stepped on lata kids <3 shaners (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, November 13th, 2001
10:45 am	hey kids this weekend was pretty exciting hehe i havnt had one of those in a while but ya it was way fun thanks to dj for promising me a ride home then ditching me hehe =) and thanx to xcgx for givin me a ride home high five to my one south county friend haha damn straight me a kristyn look cute together cause we're fucking sexy kids tyler you need to get working on those flavored body rings that would make up some good times hehe...its all about lip rings haha ive never kissed a girl with her toungue peirced haha did i mention im getting my nipples pierced =P lata sweet cheeks <3 (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, November 9th, 2001
10:20 am	hey kids things havn't been so great at home i got kicked out yesterday then my mom begged me to come back wtf my mom tried to commit suicide lastnite but i stopped her now shes mad cause i flushed all her pills down the toilet fuck her things will get better this morning they were ok nothing oo special though she was still yelling alot and whatnot ummm tonites show is gonna be fun hopefully lots of cool kids will be there but im sure there will be people i would rather not see which isnt christie cause i actully wouldnt mind seeing her i still care about her and i still love her we both fucked up i know that and we both caused alot of fucking drama and it was no fun but its over so hopefully somehow we can move on we may have given up on "us" but hopefully we'll still have our friendship i have never told anyone to not like her in fact i have found myself defending her in several cases but it dosnt even matter anymore this weekend is hopefully gonna be fun i'll prolly hangout with my daddy sat and work for him so i can get some money and then disneyland sunday and knotts with my family on monday and i can take someone i dunno who though i think i found pics of me and randy at knotts it took me by surprise i dont remember that i think it was last veterans day i dunno we go every year as far as "kristyn and I" there is nothing to fuss about all i know for sure is that i love that girl and care about her oh so much but as for now im just just gonna take a break i know the drama wont dissapear but his will help and christie i want you to know that i love you and i want to be your friend cause thats all i really need right now i know ive hurt you and im sorry...we both have been hurt and now im left with no one to heal the wounds but I will move on and im sure you allready are hugs <3 shaners (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, November 7th, 2001
10:38 am	you know what is funny i know of 3 close friends of mine and they all want kristyn haha its good stuff tata (8 Comments |Comment on this)
10:19 am	you guys are soooo funny this is good stuff...dont I feel special look christie is an ohk gal but when someone tells you they dont go out with boyz you should know youre wasting your time and as far as everyone thinking me and kristyn are "together" i dunno all i know is that i still catch myself thinking about christie and what i coulda done differently so im obviously not over it but im almost there im taking a break from girlz maybe after a month or so if everything is still the same then i'll give kristyn a shot her and I have an amazing friendship and i dont want to screw that up at all... i talked to a new friend of mine named rose and thats what she suggested just to take a break and if the feelings still remain after a month then to go for it...I think thats good advice so im gonna take it my homelife isnt that great right now my mom and I are constantly fighting and my hope for a better relationship between us is wilting away im in desperate need of a job I found myself eating ritz crackers with vegan lunchmeat it wasnt exactly the most satisfying meal our new place has one bedroom and one bathroom which is allready turning into a problem but theres not much i can do i try to avoid home as much as possible these days Turns out not that many people liked christie that much...that jut being the people ive told that everything was over and everyone ive talked to is pushing me to go for kristyn but like i said i need a break and i need to get completely over christie cause i'll be compltely honest im not people warned me and i didnt think i knew what she was like from the begining but i was too naive...but i shall move on i will move on i know she never wanted to hurt me but she did and continued too and she wouldnt have changed she wasnt willing i wasnt worth it ... but thats ohk i know i id wrong things too but whatever theres nothing i can do now and theres nothing i could have done to make her say what she really felt i know that night she just wanted to be friends but she denied it she left it all up to me haha it was hard but i knew she didnt want anything so even if i would have said to continue nothing would have changed at all she didnt know what she wanted she never did she didnt have the answers shes confused and needs friends right now dont we all (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, November 5th, 2001
10:55 am	i just read the top ten signs of suicide ... I have 8 of those qualities but one that stuck out was wanting to make ammends and thats something ive really wanted to do with people since the begining of summer ive been dating girls from one to the other kris (we dont talk ever) andrea (hates me) angelina (too busy to evr hang out) hayley (thinks im an asshole im told) christie (oh man) and now kristyn who knows what will happen with that i honestly just think i need a break im tired of getting screwed over it dosnt feel nice by the way im officially south county...will it make me prettier thats all girls care about anywayz ive had an urge to talk to andrea but i know she'll never want to talk to me again whatever lata kids (28 Comments |Comment on this)
10:49 am	i feel sick would you care if i died? (6 Comments |Comment on this)
10:09 am	hello kids ummmm christie and I are no more as much as she wants to deny it she just wanted to be friends it makes me sick that she couldnt have just told me that herself but she didnt want it to go anywhere and she knows that and i figured it all out she pushed me away i was unwanted shes a coward bye bye (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, November 1st, 2001
2:47 pm	halloween was ohk nuthin too exciting i wish christie coulda come but its ohk hopefully we will see eachother this weekend me spending the night would be very cool of course i want to talk to her but my mom is bien mean and stuff and were starting to move today and stuff so im really busy i think im goin to cave in tommarow this girl named alex i dont know her too well which might make me a lil uncomfotable but she seems like a cool chica and her sister is going too which is funny because she used to have some huge crush on me even though weve never spoken once ok bye bye kids bye kids (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 31st, 2001
4:24 pm	im feeling really lonely right now sometimes i feel like i just want someone to hold but no 1 is here after readin christie lj i cant help but think im wasting my time...but the last thing i want to do is give up but weve dating for a little while now it seems like its at zero once again... am I wasting my time irronically only time will tell...i need to talk to her but i cant right now bye bye (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 30th, 2001
11:20 pm	i should get some sleep i dont think christie is calling back and im too scared to call her now cause it is late...she didnt call back lastnite either ohwell im sure its not her fault lata kids (Comment on this)
10:49 pm	whats best right now something so right, seems like an opportunity that cannot be passes. Your heart is screaming...YES. Your head is clouded. My vision is clouded very easily by the time spent. Time only brings about more pain. The antithesis to why the opportunity was presented. Saved by your absense. Redemtion by loneliness. Solace in seclusion. Wouldn't it be easy? Redemtion by loneliness. Wouldn't it be easy right now? Too little time, too many things too find. What seems like the best right now may not be forever. the wise words of MR Ray Harkins Current Mood: determined Current Music: taken - whats best right now (Comment on this)
Monday, October 29th, 2001
10:56 pm	i never called things off with christie we are still "dating" i love her we are happy with the way things are right now we are i going to move on and attempt to make things work peace out kids ps sorry for any previous bitterness but i am no longer goning to be really detailed in these entrys cause if you really wanted to know you would ask...how about you start with "hows it goin" i like that phrase ya start with that one goodbye (2 Comments |Comment on this)
10:50 am	VOLLYBALL FUCKING SUCKS! (4 Comments |Comment on this)